Living with breast cancer and chronic pain isn’t just about managing symptoms; it’s about navigating real life when everything hits at once. These journal entries detail two heavy days where nerve throbbing, joint pops, and side effects from an earlier lightning strike collided with the tender grief of my father’s dementia and the stress of tight finances. But even when exhaustion sets in and the path ahead feels overwhelming, faith breaks through. Comfort in scripture, quiet moments with God, and small daily victories with loved ones provide the strength to keep stepping forward.
January 25
5:00 woke few times in night. Once when I was tossing, my rt arm popped causing extreme pain. I moaned “ow” a few times.
Song: there were a couple of hymns playing in my mind once I woke, but I can’t remember them now that I want to jot them down. Song playing now is “Blessings”
My whole body hurts. Eyes difficult to open. Head hurts. Arms throbbing as if I worked out. Shoulders have sharp pain. Neuropathy from shoulder to finger tips both sides. Low back aches. Legs tingling and aching. Feet tingling and hurt. Exhausted. Fell like I could sleep for days. Face itches slightly. Thirsty. Odd taste in mouth.
Received tornado warning eminent on phone. Apparently a tornado was spotted in our area last night.
Dezirae asks for help with the hem in her skirt. Get to looking at it. Half the hem is out. Good thing I keep needle and thread next to bed. Decide to sew hem instead of pinning like she asked.
I smell burnt popcorn. Yuck. No one is cooking anything in house. Oh, I forgot that I had to bring the dehydrating onions in last night because of the storm. Maybe that’s what I’m smelling.
Scripture: Philippians 4:8; Job 33:26-28; Proverbs 23-24
Share my story in the cancer support group. Looking forward to the support and learning how to navigate through my cancer journey.
I’m so exhausted. I decide to take a short nap while listening to wholetones music.
Improving gut health
If Your Gut Health Is Out Of Whack, You Could Be Missing These Important Foods
Tasks: work on tax preparation more, couple loads laundry, put dinner in crock-pot, make fresh veggie juice, do couple chores around house, post hymn story to blog
My left arm is really hurting and feels like it swelling. Called Dr. Dr asked when PT is scheduled. Told them 1/31. Suggested that I take Tylenol for the pain and continue doing my exercises.
Decided to take break for lunch and rest my arm a bit.
Vitamin C to fight cancer
http://www.doctoryourself.com/Cancer_Why_IV_C.html
Plumber finally came to help fix kitchen sink and install new faucet. It cost way more than I anticipated, but it’s in and working. Not sure how we’re going to pay rest of bills for the month. God please provide.
Mom asked if Joe or I would come over to help with something. Got to talk with my sister, April, for a bit. Able to give her some encouragement and share health tips I’ve learned. Need to send her some flavored teas soon.
I sat and chatted with Dad for a bit. I think the long goodbye is the hardest to deal with because they aren’t the same person you used to know and as the disease progresses it gets harder. I try to cherish every moment, but when you’re close as dealing with it daily 24/7 it’s hard to remember he doesn’t mean some of the things he says. I hurt for Mom.
My left arm is throbbing and hurts. Applied Miracle II cream, but still itchy. Little while later, applied calendula cream. Tired, but wide awake. Face itches. Took colloidal silver and swished with Nystatin oral rinse. Thrush is still prevalent. Low back throbbing. Legs ache deeply.
Thankful for
1. Being able to talk with surgeon’s office about my arm. Given suggestions to try to help.
2. First PT appointment is scheduled for January 31st
3. Able to get our faucet installed today, though I wasn’t expecting to have to pay so much.
4. God will provide the funds to pay bills
January 26
5:45 left shoulder popped during night while tossing and woke me from the pain. Feeling hot. Whole body aches.
Song: ♫ Blessings ♫
Scripture: James 4:10; Proverbs 25-26; Matthew 15-17; Numbers 23:21-23
Need to get up to help Dezirae study and share scripture and pray with her before she leaves for school. I’m so tired. Brew myself a cup of decaf green tea.
Craving steak fajitas, but I haven’t been able to get to the grocery store to get groceries.
Tasks: decide on dinner for tonight, order B12, continue tax preparation for filing, wash 2 loads laundry, work on bulletin for Sunday and other items for church, vacuum living room, arm exercises, listening to music, post suit for sale
Reached out to breast cancer support group to ask questions. Asking for input about radiation. I just can’t wrap my head around it yet. I so wanted clear margins in my pathology report after surgery and didn’t get it.
Joe called several times today. He’s getting promoted but he has to go get a physical first. He has to pay out of pocket for the physical. It’s going to cost about $80. Frustrating! We don’t have the money. Plus he has to go today, which means he’s gotta clock out early to get it done, which also means we’re pushing time for church tonight.
Stress eating for first time. It’s not fulfilling. See a commercial during lunch/rest period for a blizzard with Oreo cookies. It looks good. I make comment that I could go for one right now. Jordon decided to go get me one because he’s craving ice cream.
Joe decides to go straight to Dr appt I stead of coming home first then meet us at church. I decide not to bring dinner as to not add stress. Plus, there’s some food at church if anyone wants to eat something. On the way to church, my itchy skin flares up immensely. I suppose the ice cream was too much for my stomach. Ugh.
Browsing Facebook, the following info popped up in my feed
Cancer therapies TIPS & TRICKS GUIDE
https://lm.facebook.com/l.php?u=https%3A%2F%2Fleadmagnetinflammation.s3.ca-central-1.amazonaws.com%2FCancer%2BTherapies%2BSupport%2BGuide.pdf&h=AT2OJ8dvsgswUGK1X7TojsAnbwy71BEI5WHGm6XtEUIhjHYWouJ7ziOfFAaQp7WaP2My8ArKVvNpV2t_C-GJQMtrnDzyi6Qt3llgfyhy222IVNfAuns_sHFwwzmL0XYGPDS1QlZV7n-bxKx-wZef
Skin on left arm itching intensely. Applied calendula cream. Not working. Applied Miracle II gel. Not working. Washed arm with warm water and wash cloth. Applied colloidal silver. Arm is burning. Applied wound healing essential oil rub. Itch is easing.
Brew cup of chamomile tea. Took night vitamins. Took 1/2 a benadryl. Getting very sleepy. Going to bed.
Thankful for
1. Joe getting a promotion. Not sure if or how much of a raise he will get, but it gives perks like earned paid sick time and vacation time, and possible vehicle. This would ease the issue of needing a vehicle to get back and forth for appointments if I choose to do the radiation.
2. Joe did good job preaching. Stepped on my toes a bit, but I needed it.
3. Actually, able to help Dezirae with math homework tonight after church.
4. Able to scrub tub and clean shower today. Made me feel good about accomplishing a chore.
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If you’re just joining my journey, you can read how it all began — from the lightning strike to breast cancer and the faith lessons God carried me through along the way.
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Hello world! – Charitymaeprosper