May 24
5:50 woken by thunder. Severe storm came through last night. Thunder and lightning kept waking me. I’m in much pain. Nerves and muscles are tense throughout body.
It’s supposed to thunderstorm through Thursday.
Romans 12:10; Psalm 131, 138-139, 143-145; Matthew 11:28-30
7:45 getting very sleepy. Need to close eyes for few moments.
Slept for about an hour.
Morning meds and vitamins taken.
Folded and put away two loads clothes. Researched info for voting today. Rescheduled Rae’s drivers test. Called to make sure what we needed to bring.
Drank carrot juice.
Needed break from computer. Brain hurts and vision blurring. Feet freezing. Put socks on to warm feet.
Hung clothes. Decided to work on blog for little bit. Able to finish posting July 2020 memoirs. Will need to transfer more memoirs to post more.
I’m exhausted and need to eat lunch. Afternoon vitamins taken.
Carrot juice with Moringa Leaf powder.
I feel like I’m fading. Whole body hurts. Headache. Exhausted.
1:58 laying down to rest. Playing wholetones. Double checked to make sure I took noon vitamins – don’t remember doing so. Alarm set in case I fall asleep.
Sinuses congested. Left shoulder throbbing. Headache. Tylenol sinus. taken.
Went to vote once Joe got home from work. I totally forgot that this was Jordon’s first time voting and I didn’t take a picture.
Dezirae helped me cook dinner tonight. Jakob requested Welsh rarebit while he was home. I decided to add a little hamburger in it and bacon on the side. Dezirae offered to saute the green beans. Yum.
Opened cabinet door and all the foil, wraps, and shelf fell on the right two little toes. I hollered because it hurt. Joe quickly asked if I was okay. Told him what happened. Told boys at dinner if I wonder why my two little toes are bruised remind me.
Went for walk after dinner with Mom, Holly, and Dezirae. I could only go so far. Told them I’d stop and rest so they could go farther. Mom chose to stay with me.
Walked 1654 steps in .56 miles in 48 minutes. I’m really hurting now. Need to sit a little while til low back throbbing eases some. Limping and in much pain.
Sat for quite a while once home. Snacked on green beans, strawberries (shared some with Caleb), and cucumbers. I picked movie I knew the nephews would enjoy. 😉
Forgot to drink water today. I can feel it too.
Feeling very lethargic today. Every fiber of my being hurts in some way or another. Nerves stinging immensely. Muscles twitching especially in my legs after walking. Headache. Eyes sensitive to light. Lft shoulder sharp stabbing pain. Rt foot swollen and throbbing intensely. Feet tingling. Low back throbbing immensely. Chest center throbbing. Exhausted. Vision blurry at times. Neck hurts. Shoulders ache. On the plus side, my sinuses aren’t as congested today. Trouble swallowing pills.
May 25
4:00 I crashed quickly last night. Woke from strange dream.
My nerves are stinging moderately through body. I’m extremely thirsty. Use restroom and rinse mouth out with water. Drink several gulps upon returning to bed.
Song on mind: 🎶I Believe God🎶
Chorus: I believe God though the lightning is flashing. I believe God though the thunder is crashing. I believe God when the storm is all passed. That we’ll reach the other side safe at last. For the Lord stood by me in the darkest night.
Said sweet child of mine everything is alright.
You’re never alone
We’ll make it on home
For I believe God.
Remembered that stress relief tea or chamomile tea helps calm nerves. Decided to check with one would be better. Chose chamomile tea. I’ll be calming nerves plus fighting the cancer. It’s a Win Win!
https://marnieclark.com/chamomile-is-an-effective-cancer-fighter/
5:50 sipping chamomile tea while reading my Bible. Can feel nerves calming and I’m getting sleepy.
1 Chronicles 26-29; Psalm 127; James 1:19; Isaiah 40:31
6:27 need to close my eyes for few minutes. Nerves tingling and stinging due to the severe thunderstorm. Chamomile tea has helped ease it some. I’m very sleepy.
8:50 forgot to set alarm. Can’t believe I slept that long.
Juice for the day. Fold load of laundry. Load in dryer. Soaking whites in bleach. Clean up kitchen a little. Start working on hemming Jakob’s suit pants. Didn’t realize he wanted me to take the out too. Hope it won’t be too difficult. Need to get a little darker thread. Take papers to burn bin. I’m exhausted. Need to rest a little bit. Feet freezing. Sinuses a little congested. Slight headache.
Thunderstorm off and on. Ugh.
12:00 off to take buddy some body armour drinks and to Dezirae’s appointment.
Make call to oncologist office to inquire about the results of PET scan and Echocardiogram. Will call me back tomorrow.
Decided to work on transferring info for blog. I need to schedule time better for blog. Have ideas I would like to figure out how to implement. Definitely need to learn more how to navigate.
Stopped at sport store on way home to get Rae an outfit for camp. She’s as picky as me when it comes to clothing. I was getting frustrated at first but God reminded me that I was just as picky. I’d rather her be picky than dress like the world.
Had to stop at grocery store for ginger, toilet paper, and gray thread. Rae asked for snack at store. I agreed and said I needed to get something to. I just realized I hadn’t eaten all day and its after 3:00pm. I opt for the protein snack pack.
Rested for short while when we got home. Then started working on altering Jakob’s suit pants. It was easier than expected, but took me a while to figure out. Also reinforced seams so they don’t bust easily. Whomever sewed them in first place did lousy job.
Stress from church issues cause more pain to ensue. Brain is fried and fuzzy. Joe upset so it upsets me. I try to calm situation and only make it worse. Best thing I can do is walk away and pray. I get angry and smack wall. I sit down and scold self and pray some more.
Joe offers to cook the meat once he gets home. A little later he asks me to come to him. He gives me hug. I hold on tight and tell him he’s going to make me cry and I’m not trying to. He asks why. I tell him because stress makes me hurt worse than I already do and it makes me want to cry. Also, I feel horrible bcuz I forgot y’day was Jordon’s first time voting and I didn’t take his picture.
Take break for dinner. Drink 16 oz juice. The more tired and wore out I get the worse my speech gets. Having trouble speaking tonight. I’m actually stuttering a lot. I’ve had to stop and slow down just to get my thoughts out and still stuttered. Joe tells the kids that he’s still not used to me stuttering at times.
Honestly, I’m not either. Having trouble expressing thoughts let alone stuttering at times to even get out what I’m trying to say is very difficult for me. I’m still the walking dictionary in the family I just have to work harder at time to spit it out.
6:00 a friend shoots me a message thanking me for the card and let me know she’s praying for me as well. I continue to try to be an encouragement to her and share some things with her that have helped me.
6:50 Joe recvd call from church member checking in on us. His mom might be at church with him on Sunday. I can hear part of the conversation even though Joe doesn’t have it on speaker phone. He tell Joe that he told his mom about needing to pray for us bcuz of the breast cancer. He proceeds to tell her that I’m a tough lady bcuz even though I’m dealing with this she’s been counseling and encouraging others with their trials. I chuckle and tell Joe I was just talking with a woman trying to encourage her.
7:30 recvd call from church friend that’s in need of prayer. She’s having her leg amputated to above her knee tomorrow. We chat a while. I offer to pray with her before we hang up. She seems to be in good spirits.
Able to drink 56 oz today. Vitamins & medicines taken. Think I’m at the tail end of the sinusitis and bronchitis, but I still wear out easily.
My entire body is in much pain all over. I’m beyond exhausted. Trouble hemming second leg of pants correctly. I’ve attempted it 2.5 times now. I’m done. I need to go to bed and try again early in the morning.
Thankful for…
1. God’s abundant grace and love
2. Being able to work things out with Joe and hug
3. Family
