July 21
Woke in middle of night to use restroom.
Center of chest aches greatly. Able to maneuver to get back to pop. It eases pain a little. Fall asleep with the song “Big Enough” in my mind.
4:30 woken by severe abdominal cramping. Need to use restroom – diarrhea. Got to get this under control. Step on scale. I’m down to 177lbs. Lost 7lbs this go around so far. Take lomotil and Probiotic.
https://www.dana-farber.org/health-library/articles/managing-chemotherapy-induced-diarrhea/
Psalm 119:39; Isaiah 28-30; Romans 1:16
Getting very sleepy. Will probably fall back to sleep soon. I’m exhausted.
Slept till little after 7am.
Trying to figure out how to improve my gut health and in turn overcome the chemo induced diarrhea.
https://marnieclark.com/are-there-any-healthy-sugar-substitutes/
https://marnieclark.com/why-probiotics-and-prebiotics-are-so-crucial-during-chemotherapy/
https://marnieclark.com/what-is-the-candida-breast-cancer-connection/
3:50 I’ve purposely rested today so I can go to last night of VBS. In getting ready for church, I have to do my hair. It’s knotted horrible. I’ve never had that problem. I spray it with water and carefully pick it out. Handfuls of hair are falling out. After I get it picked out and scrunched, I use mirror to check back of head. I have bald spots that can’t be covered up reasonably. It’s time to start wearing turbans. I try really hard to be brave, but I lose it emotionally and have a meltdown. I call for Buddy and ask for a hug. He asks what’s wrong. I tell him. He gives me a big hug and tells me it’s going to be okay. I ask if the turban I chose looks ok. He assures me it does.
I go back to finish getting ready. My left side torso starts cramping horribly like y’day. I take 2 calcium pills and drink a bunch of water.
Make it to church and I’m exhausted. Sort through mail. Decide to go lay down a while in nursery.
Joe comes to get me a while later so I can say hi to the church. He has the church say a special prayer for me. I stay until game time then go lay back down. Joe keeps coming to check on me. Tells me he’s glad I’m here because he missed having his wife serving with him in ministry. I miss it too, but I’m just there not doing too much today.
Back up when Jakob is preaching.
10:00 tonight was too too much. I’m overly exhausted, hurting, nauseous. At least I haven’t had diarrhea in 12 hours. Crashing…
July 22
7:00 woken by severe stomach cramping needing to use restroom – diarrhea. Up and down several times.
7:40 take 2 Rx diarrhea tabs and drink 8oz water.
Was up and down several times in middle of night as well. May need to call Drs. Headache. Cold and thirsty.
Matthew 16:15-16; Isaiah 31-34;
Had to call Dr. Can’t seem to get handle on the diarrhea. Stomach pains -severe at times, I’ve gone to bathroom 8+ times since 4 am. Medicine not helping. Headache. Lips chapped.
Muscles aches deeply throughout body. Nerves stinging slightly. Upper arms feel bruised. Headache. Feet cold, but I’ve had socks on all night. I’m chilly. Temp 97.4. Hands throbbing.
9:25 Drs nurse called back. It’s normal for chemo patients to get diarrhea. It’s got to work its course. Offered to call in Rx for stomach cramping. Declined it. I don’t want to keep adding rxs. Suggested Pepto to help my stomach. Also need to take up to 8 lomotil tabs a day. Suggested Gatorade. Told her I was drinking Body Armour. Said that was great. Drink one every time I have to visit toilet to get liquids back in me. Offered for me to come in for fluids. I asked Joe. He seemed grumpy so I declined for now.
Griped at me for not drinking enough fluids. Asked if he was mad at me. Learned that Joe is in a lot of pain from head to toe. Needs a day to rest. Tells me I need to set an alarm for every 90 minutes to drink 8oz. Told him I don’t know how. Told me to ask Google. Tried but Google is illiterate. Ugh. Checked internet to see if there’s an app for that. There is! Downloaded an app called Kropla. It asked for my weight then gave suggested amount of fluids I should be drinking daily. Allowed to adjust the amount. Sounds alarm every hour between 8:00am -9:30pm. Pretty neat especially if it’ll help me stay hydrated.
Joe making breakfast – eggs and deer sausage. Told him I could eat the eggs but not the sausage. Got up to fix hair. More hair comes out. I’m saddened, but the verse about being her crown and glory comes to mind. I wonder if I could write a devotional about this?
I’m really tired. Everytime I think I’m going to take a nap either the water alarm dings or someone is coming to check on me and/or hang with me. I mind a little because I want some sleep. Finally fall asleep around 2ish and sleep for little over an hour.
Lay in bed working on hair devotional. Decide I’m tired of being in bed and chose to join the gang in living room.
4:00 we order pizza. Papa John’s sauce has no vinegar so Bri can eat it. It takes almost an hour to get delivered. Wait another 30 minutes for Buddy to get home. Joe sent him to get me more body armor and drinks for rest of family. I try my hardest to eat it but cannot. It’s hurting my stomach. Joe makes mashed potatoes for me. Seems to be one of the few foods I can stomach right now.
9:30 starting to get a bit queasy. Decide I may have sat up too long and time for bed. Get to room and nose feels funny. I have bloody nose – no wonder I’m queasy. Ugh. Takes a minute to stop bleeding. Apply Vaseline to nostrils.
Decide to cuddle with Joe for little while. Muscles on left side torso and middle of back start cramping. Chest center begins to throb after a bit. Have to change positions.
Thankful for…
- Able to spend a little time with family today
- Able to eat couple bites of pizza
- Joe taking care of me
