Walking Through Faith in Hard Times
November 10-12, 2022
Walking through Faith in Hard Times is challenging, especially when facing illness, fatigue, and uncertainty. In these journal entries from a few days in November 2022, I share my personal experiences of living out faith in hard times each day, trusting God through physical trials, family responsibilities, and daily life challenges.
November 10
5:20 hit snooze to sleep just ten more minutes, but accidentally spilled my cup of water. Had to jump up to grab a towel to dry it up. Probably didn’t get everything. My heart is pounding hard and fast. Once lying back down took deep breaths to calm it back down.
Song: ♫ Your goodness is running after me ♫
5:30 I don’t want to get up, but need to in order to help Dezirae study. Left eye watery and burning. Center of chest hurts. Headache. Hands throbbing. Legs ache deeply. Feet cold, tingling, and throbbing.
Scripture: Job 37:5-6; 2 Thessalonians 3:16; Luke 22; John 13
Drank chamomile tea to calm my digestive tract.
Made fresh juice. Joe even drank a cup. Took trash bag to can outside. I’m exhausted.
Trying to read my Bible, but the lines are wavy making me dizzy. Need to rest my eyes.
Center of chest and top of stomach have a chilling tingling sensation. Fresh juice isn’t settling well with my stomach. Starting to feel nauseous.
Joe took me to Publix to get turkey on sale plus groceries for the week. Met a friend – Andrea. It was good to chat and catch up. She’s looking good. Thanked her for the extra attachment piece. It was very helpful.
Took half hour nap before church. Up to prepare dinner before we leave for church. Once at church, decided to work on changing the bulletin board. It was difficult but rewarding. Used fake leaves for the border, but I don’t know what else I’m going to put on it yet.
Thankful for
- Joe willing to not only take me to the store
- Able to go to church tonight
Exhausted and falling asleep.
November 11
4:00 woke with terrible headache, hot, and stuffy nose. Took sinus headache medicine.
7:30 very tired. Head still hurts. Rt eyelid twitching.
Scripture: Lamentations 3:22-26; 1 John 2:16-26; John 14-17
I’m full of mixed emotions this morning. Happy for Chandler to finally have a lung donor. Sad for the family that their child is donating the lungs. Sad for the Tollier family who’s husband and dad sacrificed his life for the cause of Christ. Nervous about my appointments, but excited and anticipating good news. Hopeful that I’ll be able to get a wig today. Nervous about how the Dr will respond to my decision of treatment.
Dr appt. Weight 167. Bp 117/75 pulse 74. I had good visits with the oncologist and surgeon today. As for my bloodwork, my numbers are still not in the normal range but are slowly returning to normal. I’m still anemic. Dr. suggested I start taking B12. PET scan results were positive! The cancer has shrunk significantly. It can no longer be seen in my underarm and has shrunk to 1 cm in my breast. Praise God!! . A few spots were seen in my lung, but since they are non-calcified, they think it’s due to my having a touch of pneumonia during my recent flu scare. They’re pretty confident that they won’t cause a problem, but they will keep an eye on them. Surgery is scheduled for December 1st. The surgeon has agreed that God has been good to us. I’ll have to have an MRI and an EKG prior to surgery. We need prayers that when the pathologist reads the cancer cells under the microscope during surgery, there is no other cancer. I’ll have three lymph nodes in the underarm removed as long as there is no other indication of cancer, plus the removal of the tumor in the left breast.
I will meet with the radiologist on Wednesday (11/16) to learn what they mean by “targeted therapy” and see the machinery.
I informed my oncologist that I’m leaning towards taking three months off to allow my body to heal from the chemotherapy, and if the cancer is not continually responding to natural therapy then I’ll consider radiation. He said that was reasonable and was okay with that. He will continue to follow up with me every three months for now. After surgery, I will continue to get immune therapy treatments every three weeks for at least a year. God is so good!
I was also given a wig today. Check out my new hairdo! It’s going to take a bit to get used to it.
Praise God that I’m already starting to get new hair growth. The oncologist says it’ll probably take about 6–10 months before it’s long enough to style.
While I was choosing my new hairdo, one of my nurses came to let me know that the devotional and Scripture journaling calendars that I left last time were snatched up in minutes. May God bless, touch hearts, and help others who are searching. I brought a copy of the current Scripture journaling calendar just in case. She thanked me and began making copies to share with others. I’m humbled that God would use me to glorify Him. Oh, God, I’m unworthy but so willing to be used for Your glory and honor. Thank you, Lord! . God has truly answered my Jabez prayer of enlarging my coast beyond what I asked or thought (1 Chronicles 4:10)! May God be magnified!
Stopped at parents house to give them the good news. Surprised my Mom with my new hairdo. She was shocked, but said it looked good. Gave me a big hug. Hudson and Caleb’s reactions were priceless. If only we thought to take video. Lol.
After a bit I had to lay down for a nap. I was so exhausted from the days events. As I pondered about the day, I began crying about how good God has been. I feel so unworthy to be used of God is my desire.
Tummy hurts. Not certain why. Horrible taste in mouth. Nothing seems to help. Neuropathy in hands and arms are bothersome. Back aches. Head beginning to itch. I wonder if it’s due to the new hair growth.
Thankful for 1. The great news that the cancer has shrunk significantly. 2. The blessing of a wig
November 12
4:30 broken sleep. Woke to use restroom. Question on mind: how to naturally natural remedies to clear pneumonia spots from lungs?
https://allremedies.com/home-remedies-for-pneumonia/
https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/324483#summary
Eyes watery. Headache. Nasal congestion. Runny nose. Tired. Coughing. Arms and hands tingling and throbbing. Tummy feels better. My arms feel like I worked out y’day, but I didn’t. I did however walk 5,280 feet, which equals a mile.
Joe awake too. He decided to give me massage with essential oils. It felt so good.
Scripture: Lamentations 3:26; Colossians 1:9; Matthew 27; Mark 15
Song: ♫ He loved as I were His only child ♫
Restoring heart rhythm naturally
https://www.besthealthmag.ca/list/natural-home-remedies-palpitations/
Decided since the men were having men’s prayer breakfast today that Dezirae and I would make a day of shopping. Brought wheelchair because I knew I would not be able to walk the entire mall. Found excellent sale on pair of shoes for Dezirae. Saved $55!
