Tag: anxiety

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Lightning Strikes Memoirs 2021 February 19-20

Feb 19

1000 woah! I must have been tired. Slept 10 hours. Whole body aches deep all over. Upper body & back aches exponetially like I overworked out in a gym. The only thing I did different yday was attempt to vacuum the livingroom. Tis good I was able to do so, but man the pain hurts.

Guy coming today to look at house about possibility of buying it. Not thrilled about moving (mainly the packing part), but curious to see how God is working in our lives.

1022 stepped on scale to check weight. I’m disgusted. Gained back the 6 lbs I just lost. Ugh!

Stopped drinking the juicing from store bc 95% of them have a little bit of banana in them. By weeks end, I almost went into anaphylaxis…throat was quite swollen to point I was having trouble swallowing & sinuses were severely congested. Had to take Benadryl to counteract. If I’m going to do juicing, it has to be on my own terms without bananas.

200 went to run errands for friend. When I got to firehouse, realized my phone was missing. I went into panic state of mind. Quick prayer asking Lord to keep my phone safe and help me find it quickly. Called pharmacy. Front clerk hadn’t seen it. Let her know I was on my way back to retrace steps. Once back at pharmacy, checked with pharmacist. When I was having trouble with paying for the rx, I set my phone on counter and forgot about it. Thankfully, pharmacy clerk put it up for me. I let front clerk know I found it. She remembered me from earlier bc I gave her a gospel tract.

Great article in this weeks Guardian Newspaper which gives a reasonably accurate and non-sensational explanation of the story of someone who was hit by lightning, and the help she got from the LS&ESSI:

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2021/feb/16/lightning-strike-survivors-support-group?CMP=Share_iOSApp_Other

930 chilling sensation at base of brain and back of neck. Asked Joe to feel back of neck to see if he could feel it. He said it was chilly to the touch but not bad like my back or chest gets. Told him I was just checking to make sure I was really felling it or not.

Feb 20

Went to church for few hours today to do some sprucing up and install lights at sign , on poats, and replace bulb in security light.

Unable to go out soul winning due to cold weather (29° brrr). High today was upper 50’s.

Joe decided to spend the night in mission house on way home. I got upset because I still had alot to do to get ready let alone pack clothes, makeup, toiletries, three meals, etc. Being thrown off my schedule throws me in a tizzy especially if I feel rushed. It upset Joe. After I completed bulletin and printing it, I calmed down enough to ask Joe to help me get ready. He agreed but was surprised at how much I packed just for one night. Lol

The lights the guys installed look good and certainly brighten up the sign and front yard at night.

Decided to change nail polish. Got frustrated bc it took me several hours and I kept messing up. Feet are freezing bc I painted toenails too.

Slight headache. Chilling sensation at base of neck and top of shoulders. Hands, wrists, & forearms swollen and throbbing. Low back & right hip throbbing. Legs ache. Funny taste in mouth. Tongue white patches. Allergy bumps on top of arms. Feet freezing & tingling. Toes tingling. Tired

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Lightning Strikes Memoirs 2021 February 15-16

Feb 15

545a throat not as swollen. Benadryl helped. Need to learn how to juice on my own. 90% of store juices have bananas in them of which I’m allergic to. Whole body aches but not as bad as the weekend. Sinuses congested. Headache. Exhausted.

Every gasp of nervousness or fear on interstate or in traffic causes my nerves to sting! Semi just cut us off.

Psalms 56:3 What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee.

650 back home safe. Headache worsening. Load in washer. Need to rest a bit.

800 didn’t plan on sleeping that long.

300 stopped at Wal-Mart to get few items with kids.

400 on way to pick up Joe from work, guy cuts me off. Scares me but bc he’s on Dezirae’s side it make me angry . I think it through and just decide to blubber to myself. Don’t hurt my baby girl or I’ll hurt you.

728 costochondritis rearing its ugly head! Sharp immense stabbing pain in center of chest. Chest keeps popping if I move much in any direction. Reclining in chair with heating pad square in center of chest.

Stretches to ease costochondritis pain

https://costochondritis.com/stretches-for-costochondritis/

930 high pitch ringing sound in let ear lasting a minute

1000 using heating pad to warm bed up. Head spinning. Back throbbing. Sharp stabbing pain in chest. Arms & hands throbbing. Head pounding. Neck hurts. Feet chilly. Chilling tingling sensation at base of brain. Ears starting to get chilly. Exhausted. All the running back and forth drains me.

Feb 16

700 hard freeze warning…it’s 20° outside.

Woke to arms and hands tingling. Sinuses congested. Headache. Neck hurts. Feels like I broke a fever. Whole body aches deeply. Tired. Calves burn as if I just walked a mile. Feet feel like I’m stepping on broken glass as I stand. Vision is blurry making reading very difficult. Low back throbbing.

Read Numbers 14-15, 1 John 3:10-12, Psalm 69:13,

1000 Curious? Do you ever find yourself gazing over your life and just feel overwhelmed by God’s grace?

As I’m trying to gather information for taxes, I begin to think about my children… We will have one graduating from college and getting married next year. Our second son graduates high school this year, and then I will only need to prepare curriculum for our daughter who will be a Sophomore in high school. All I can say is Thank you, Lord!

You see I was struck by lightning 3.5 years ago. I sustained multiple health issues as a result…TBI (traumatic brain injury) is one of them. Many of my symptoms will most likely be lifelong and majority of doctors have no idea how to help. Though I look fine on the outside, I am in constant pain and headaches/migraines are a regular occurrence.

I feel like I lost three years of my life because I was just surviving and barely could comprehend what was going on in my life. Yet, I strove to keep moving forward while leaning on the Lord and my family. It was sometime last year that the fog I was living in began feeling like it was lifting and life began looking a bit clearer. Miraculously our brains are designed to heal themselves.

I stand amazed at how the Lord is bringing me through and is allowing me to continue to be used for His glory.

Ephesians 2:10 For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus unto good works, which God hath before ordained that we should walk in them.

1200 center of chest is hurting horribly!!!! Sharp stabbing pain stops me in my tracks.

530 worked on trying to gather tax info for CPA most of day with breaks in between. Migraine oncoming. Brain hurts. Vision blurred & fogged. Feet freezing. Chilling sensation at base of brain. Took Excedrine migraine to stop it. Resting for night. Almost ready to take info to CPA I think.

550 center of back freezing cold.

1120 took several hours for feet to warm up to room temp. Migraine gone but still have bad headache. Took night meds. Noticed I forgot to take morn meds. Oh bother.

http://stormhighway.com/survivor.php

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Lightning Strikes Memoirs 2021 February 3-4

Feb 3

530 woke several times in night to use restroom. Woke suddenly from terrible nightmare. Feeling very groggy from migraine ex’s.

700 migraines sure do take a lot out of a person. Slight bloody nose.

230 trip to Wal-Mart. Needed few groceries. Also chose to get needed items for church instead of treking downtown to Sam’s. Able to walk behind buggy, but struggled with pushing and controlling direction of buggy after Jordon put bottled water on bottom.

330 letting Jordon drive home. My anxiety levels are high! I can tell we haven’t been anywhere much lately. Let me clarify, Jordon is overall good driver. I get nervous even if Joe or I am driving. My brain kicks into hyperdrive…I envision defensive driving and what other drivers are going to do or car is going too fast for my liking. So many things could happen. I try to stay calm. I hum hymn in brain or quote Scripture. I pray a lot! Still my nerves are in flight or fight mode.

I have recently by accident discovered a new coping mechanism to help reduce my anxiety levels while riding in car. Joe was driving other day and I inadvertently picked up one of those squishy orange pieces that you plug your ears with to dampen sounds. I started squishing it to see what shapes I could make. This in turned took my focus off the road and helped to keep me calm enough that I didn’t once yell or scream. I noticed it upon reaching our destination. I mentioned I needed a larger one. Dezirae found a Yoda-shaped squishy toy at the thrift store the other day. We washed it and it has become my new riding companion while traveling.

700 chatting with friend via a texting. Discovered our CPA charges a lot more. May try a new one this year. It’ll save bunch of money.

In most cases it’s best to chat via phone, but with TBI it’s easier for me to chat via texting/messaging. I have difficulty comprehending what is being said because it takes all my energy to focus on person speaking and trying not to get distracted on whatever else is going on around me. This way if I don’t understand what was said I can ask Joe to interpret for me. It saves for lot less confusion.

1030 surprisingly had less pain today. Still got tired after activity but not terrible.

Headache it tolerable. Neck hurts. Hands ache. Skin itchy especially neck area. Low back aches. Legs ache. Lower lft leg slight tourniquet tightening feeling with minor numbness down leg to foot. Feet freezing. Toes sting. Ears humming. Muscles stiff.

Night meds taken.

1115 chest starting to hurt something aweful.

Feb 4

530 forgot to hang keys up from yday. Woken to ask where I put them.

700 bad headache. Going to try to sleep it off.

800 bad headache still here. Not sure why so sleepy. BP slightly elevated 128/89. Going to drink some herbal tea to see if that’ll help.

Headache has eased ever so slightly. Wondering if something’s a muck and need to get it back in balance

 

Info from LS&ES support group…try a supplement called PEA. This helps regulate glial cells in the brain.

A lightning strike can cause these cells to go haywire! I’ll send you a link. I’m (Matthew an ND (Naturopathic Doctor) so this is what I do. https://vitalitus.com/product/pea/

Could glial activation be a factor in migraine?

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/19036526/

Glial Cell Activation and Neuroinflammation: How They Cause Centralized Pain

https://www.practicalpainmanagement.com/pain/other/glial-cell-activation-neuroinflammation-how-they-cause-centralized-pain 

http://doctoryourself.com/naturedoc.html

1145 severe pain in center of chest!!!

Bent over to touch toes to pop chest back in place – small pops.

Feet freezing! Putting wool socks on.

300 took longer to help Dezi with her English. Kept getting off topic. Head pounding more. Brain & vision feel blurred. Eyes dancing rapidly.

400 headache won’t quit. Yawning a lot today.

My headache is affecting my speech. Saw a DG bag on side of road and tried to say “DG point for me – bag in ditch.” Instead, I said “DG point for me gab for me.” Ugh.

Heading to church. Have lots to do to get ready for services next week.

720 head hurts so much that my eyes feel like it’s going cross-eyed. Face feels flushed. Cheeks feel hot.

1100 still have migraine. Took night meds. Taking relpax. Only take it as last resort because it makes me drowsy.

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Lightning Strikes Journal Entries 30-31 January 2021

Jan 30

800 strange dream. Woke to both arms and hands numb and tingly. Head itches. Used let hand to itch but couldn’t feel hand itching. Felt weird. Neck hurts. Sinuses very congested. As I was sitting up collar bone and upper rt arm cracked. Ouch! Headache. Body itches. Eyes watery. It’s cold.

Haven’t done good job taking morning meds this week. Missed three days. Gotta try to do better.

Morning meds:

Edarbyclor 1/2 pill, propranolol 20mg 1 tab, Dexliant 30mg 1 capsule, Echinacea 400mg 1 capsule, B12 500mg 2 tabs, B6 100mg 1 tab, Vitamin C 1000mg 2 tabs.

100 church errand to find greenery for platform & a trophy. Found greenery at Hobby Lobby at 50% off. Yay! No finding trophy. Ugh. Will have to improvise – think outside box.

Mom says my numbness & tingling in mornings is symptom of fibro. Curious is the LS triggered auto immunity?

330 need to pull more yard debris to road. People finally coming tomorrow to pick up debris from the hurricanes last year. Have huge pile. Neighbor, Mom, & Dezirae helped.

500 freezing sensation in center of back. Had Joe check if it was discolored – no, but it’s icy to the touch. It’s so distracting.

1130 started load of towels too late in day. Waited to put them in dryer.

Headache. Sinuses congested. Post nasal drip. Hands & feet throbbing. Sharp pain shoot up forearms. Neck aches & stiff. Low back aches. Sides crampy. Skin itchy.

 

Jan 31

630 whole body sore, center of chest aches, legs ache. Feel like I was beat up. Joe sweet to rub my legs and back but it hurts so much. Nightmare – being attacked by octopus.

Took all my energy to get ready this morning. Exhausted. Headache.

Anxiety – accidentally discovered that squishing something while riding in car helps keep me calmer. Dezirae found Yoda squishy toy at thrift store to help.

http://www.doctoryourself.com/anxiety.html

https://m.activebeat.com/your-health/the-10-most-common-signs-of-fibromyalgia/14/

1120 it’s a blessing to be in church with family. Missing several people due to sickness or surgery recovery.

I get so frustrated at myself bc I royally messed up playing piano. Forgot tune of first hymn then totally hit wrong keys. It sounded aweful in my ears. I keep playing though bc I remember my piano teacher as a child told me to just keep playing even if you mess up bc most people in the audience won’t know you did anyways.

I am so tired. Eyes are heavy. Brain hurts. Eyes & brain feel blurry. Need a nap.

300p nap time didn’t go so well. Body in much pain. Hypersensitive. Joe was trying to help by rubbing back but the weight of his hand was making me hurt more. I wanted to lash our irrationally but didn’t. Just as I was falling asleep he’d put his hand on my back to rub it. It would scare me awake. Repeated several times. I gave up trying to sleep. Ugh. So tired.

1058 body hurts worse…pain is intense. Weather is changing. Wind is at 25 mph. Rt hip and low back throbbing. Hands & wrists throbbing. Center chest burns. Legs ache. Feet throbbing plus stinging tingling. Headache. Shoulders sting. Neck aches.

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Lightning Strikes Journal Entries 22-24 December 2020

Dec 22

https://draxe.com/health/raynauds-syndrome/

Tummy hurts, urine darkening, low grade fever, general feeling of unwellness. Think I may have start of uti. Indigestion.

Headache, eyes watery, sinus congestion, random numbness and tingling in arms & legs, muscles ache, nerve pain, feet chilly. Going to bed early 930

Dec 23

Crazy day. Joe got off work early so he and Dezirae could leave sooner to go pick up Jakob & Bri for Christmas at our house.

Shortly after they left I went to pick up Jordon from work and do the grocery shopping. Took about hour and half even with Jordon helping. Walked behind buggy bc no wheelchairs. My rt hip is killing me!

I’m exhausted and in much pain. Suppose to be a thunderstorm some time after midnight. Nerves sting thru body. Nerves in legs also feel like on fire! Skin itches. Headache. Neck hurts. Lights bothersome. Low back throbbing. Feet sting.

Took night meds and naproxen 500mg.

Dec 24

245a woke to strange noise. Soon learned it was thunder and lightning. Nerves jumped into fight or flight mode. Emergency notice on phone indicates we are under tornado watch until 11am. Make me feel uneasy. Got up and checked house from inside. Praying for God’s safety. “What time I am afraid I will trust in thee” begins to repeat in my head.

I’m so tired. Think I’ll try to fall back asleep. Rt hip screaming pain. Lft arm & hand numbish & tingly.

Rain eased around 8 or 9am. Whole body throbs.

Took shower and noticed some how I skinned my knee recently and don’t remember doing so?? It’s bleeding and needs a bandaid. Made it longer in shower before arms started cramping and giving out. Progress is good. Still wore out after shower. Have to rest a bit before moving on to next project.

Enjoying being home alone today. Pacing myself so I can enjoy Christmas day. Finished the Hawaiian.salad. worked on picking up house more. Made pumpkin cheesecake. Dinner in crockpot. Worked on bulletin some. Listen/ watch Christmas movies. All of that wore me out to near passing out. Laid down about 230.

Joe & gang arrived home around 3pm.

755 trouble keeping place while playing Christmas hymns. Frustrating. Face feels flushed and hot. Headache.

1157 in bed before midnight save three minutes. Haha. I’m exhausted and hurting from head to toe. Cinnamon rolls in fridge for morning. Plan on getting up around 7am to do personal devos before activities begin. I forgot to grab the manners and customs book at church for my Bathsheba study. Did remember everything else though. Back stinging. Head pounding. Hands & rt hip throbbing. Random muscle spasms in tummy. Tummy not hurting as bad. Started taking AZO cranberry & C capsules for possible UTI. Already starting to feel better.

Discovered that three of my prescription meds cause weight gain. I’m tripled wammied. Ugh

Thank you, Lord, for Your sacrificial gift.

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Think On These Things: TRUE

Philippians 4:7-8 –  And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

Let’s begin with verse 7…

And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:7

The Peace of God is a quiet rest that dwells in our soul.  This peace keeps our hearts and minds focused on Christ.  It is that peace that causes no anxiety or excessive care about things of this world when we commit wholly to the Lord.

Verse 8 gives us a list of things we are to keep our minds and hearts focused upon. 

Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. Philippians 4:8

The first one is – TRUE.

The King James Dictionary defines TRUE as being in accordance with the actual state of things; conformable to fact; as a true relation or narration; a true history; genuine; pure; real; not counterfeit.

We can only have an effective personal relationship with Christ as a believer if we focus our eyes upon Christ.  We do this through prayer, meditating on Scripture, and submitting our thoughts and imaginations to Christ.  We are encouraged to yield every thought to Christ (Romans 6:13, 2 Corinthians 10:5).   Let our minds dwell on Christ and not allow our hearts to control us.

Righteous living depends on keeping our minds on Christ.

When anxious thoughts begin to flood our minds, we should immediately STOP what we are doing, THINK “Is this pleasing Christ?”, and PRAY asking for God’s help.  Yet too often we allow the anxious and fretful thoughts to take over and bog us down.

Let’s choose to focus our minds on things that are true.  Forsake the lies of the devil and allow the Lord to control our thoughts. 

Fill your mind with the truth of God’s Word.

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