August 25
2am- awake
5am- awake
7:00a- alarm goes off. I’m in much pain especially my lower back. First thoughts why does it have to hurt so bad?!
8:48a- still in lots of pain. Had to get daughter to help curl back of hair as my arms already cramping. Just want to lay down til pain goes away. On positive side, migraine has eased some though still have a headache.
11:30- Reni made my day. She decided to sit with me during church. She paitently waited until I was done playing piano then scooted to snuggle next to me once I sat down. Decided to take pic and noticed our toes were painted same color.
Decided to make list of items that I see need to be done around church so 1. I can feel like I’m getting something done, be focuzed on what needs done, and 2. I can delegate help when people ask to help.
A lot of times when when people ask how I’m doing I really don’t know how to answer. I’m always in pain sometimes more than other times. It’s hard for me to know where I’m at compared to where I’ve been because of my memory until I refer to my notes. When people ask how they can help I’d not sure how to answer. Sometimes I don’t know how to help myself because I’m uncertain on what exactly is going on. To be frankly honest, I’m finding to relearn how to do lots of things. Some is due to the fact that I’m limited in physical function. The muscles on my rt side have become weak and cramp easily at the simplest chore. I’m having to learn how to go about daily chores in differents. It’s almost like learning how to be left handed instead of right handed. Yet even then I face challenges bc if I do too much I cause severe muscle and cartlidge inflammation in my chest which is very painful and puts me down for days sometimes weeks.
Planning meals has been quite difficult. I have trouble making decisions. I’m unsure if the family is going to like it. I don’t even remember if I like it half the time. My taste buds have changed. My husband is having to relearn me bc things I used to like I don’t like anymore. I don’t even remember what my favorite meal was prior to strike.
I remember that I like strawberries and still do. I loathed the color yellow. Now I like sunflowers but I still dislike yellow – go figure?
Basically, I’m learning to rediscover myself all over again. It’s frightening and exciting and overwhelming at times all in one package.
Sometimes I feel like a new child discovering all the different things in the world for the first time again. Sometimes I get frustrated because I know in my brain I should know things already (how to cook, how to clean, balance checkbook, name of objects, etc.), but for some odd reason I just can’t remember it. Sometimes my mind is just blank and I have no clue what I’m suppose to be doing.
I’ve been trying out avenues of meal plans to simplify that part of taking care of the home. Right now I’m working on planning a six week rotating schedule. Having a meal schedule not only helps me know what I plan to have for that day but also what items I need to have on hand for that week.
10:09p- severe cramping under rt rib!!!!
Pic insert x2
August 26
6:00a- pain in back pulsating like bad toothache. Lights bothersome. I hurt all over. Sinuses congested. Eyes watery. Weird dreams.
9:30a- chilling in livingroom Jordon asks me about how long my apt would be. Oh, no! I totally forgot about it lost track time. I’m going to be late!!! Ugh!
11:06- PT tested gait walking. I have improved speed by .7 millimeters per second. I don’t recall all she said but that’s a good bit of increase since starting PT in end of May. Thank you, Lord!!! Something about it decreases chances of falls and improvement of well being. She’s adjusting pt exercises to help with coordination skills bc they’re quite lacking presently.
Muscles in lower back aches and tingly.
12:20p- I’m exhausted and hurting all over. Just tried to move bed out from wall so can put headboard at head of bed. Had to ask Jordon for help. Don’t have right kind of rails to attach head and foot boards. Looks good though. Wish I could remember what she said about the gate speed thing.
1:09p- center of chest rt side hurting, low back throbbing, hands ache
10:40p- lower back & rt hip throbbing, stinging needle pain in lft thigh, lower left leg tourniquit tighten feeling with some numbness, chest aches, upper back & shoulders ache and hurt to move much, headache, hands swollen and achy. Skin extra sensitive to touch – hair on lft arm couldn’t see it but sure could feel it about drove me crazy until I could get it off me. Random muscle spams in legs.
Just remembered to order MSM. If only I could get relief from pain once in a while.
